Still taking a break, enjoying life (kind of) and brainstorming for the second draft. I was with a friend of mine today and we were having a debate over whether or not I was considered 'unemployed' because I'm a writer but I'm on one of my breaks. I thought I was working since I was brainstorming but he disagreed. It was really funny just going back and forth. :D I'm going to miss him when he leaves...
Anyways, basically, I'm just getting ready for college (starts on Monday) and really just loathing the thought of not having all the time in the world to focus on my story and characters. Then again, I haven't really been able to do as much of that during the summer because I've been sick a lot. Like right now. I seriously feel like crap. It's no bueno, believe me. Such a terrible ending to a great day.
I'll do my best to keep in touch on a more regular basis (can't make any promises when school starts but whatever)
Until next time,
Ashley the Miserable
Thursday, August 19, 2010
Saturday, August 14, 2010
Holy Cow
I didn't realize it'd been this long since I posted! My bad! Not much has really happened other than the fact that I have been sick off and on all week. A kiddie ride at Sea World nearly got the best of me actually. It was pretty bad. Still is, actually, but I think I'll survive. Basically, I've just been redoing character charts to get to know my characters more and just hanging out, not reading my draft of suckitude (I really owe it to Chris Baty for coming up with that word lol). Yeah, it's been relaxing in the sense that I don't have to read it. I'm actually thinking about just rewriting my second draft from scratch and not even bothering to fix the first one. I admit that I'm too embarrassed to read it again. No lies. I'm probably just going to go back to bed and sleep off whatever it is that I have because my cousin is in town and I don't want to be sick the entire time he's here. And I also have a friend's party to go to tonight and I really don't want to have to miss it.
Until next time,
Ashley the ill
Until next time,
Ashley the ill
Monday, August 9, 2010
Stressing Out
I think the stress I've been feeling lately has really just taken a turn for the worse. I mean, I feel like I can't do anything, like I'm wasting my time and that nothing I do is worth something. I know it's not true, that I'm just in one of my moods, but I feel so...pathetic, always asking for someone to reassure me that I'm on the right track.
To be honest, I think it was the music getting lost that was the turning point. It was something so stupid, so minor but it still made me feel like I just couldn't do something right. I am just...finding little things that I need to get done that I don't think I can do, like making a new collage, fixing my excuse of a manuscript, trying to make my characters more...well, more. It just feels so overwhelming and I just can't shake the feeling that the world is crashing down on me every time I try. And it's no bueno. I mean, ice cream didn't help, talking to my friends isn't helping, even reading or trying to sketch is just...too stressful. Because every time I pick up a book, I think "Wow - I'll never be able to make my book this good" and every time I try to draw what I imagine to be the setting, it looks like a kindergarden student attacked a piece of paper with a pen. It's so frustrating and I really just have no clue what I'm doing.
I wasn't kidding when I told my cousin I didn't know what to do with my days after I finished writing, but now it feels like such a daunting task, rewriting and editing that I just don't want to do it anymore. I really just don't know what happened, because just the other day I was so excited, so ready to work and now I just want to burn it and everything related to it. :/
I think I'm just going to go to bed and sleep this depressing mood off.
Until next time,
Ashley the...burned out.
To be honest, I think it was the music getting lost that was the turning point. It was something so stupid, so minor but it still made me feel like I just couldn't do something right. I am just...finding little things that I need to get done that I don't think I can do, like making a new collage, fixing my excuse of a manuscript, trying to make my characters more...well, more. It just feels so overwhelming and I just can't shake the feeling that the world is crashing down on me every time I try. And it's no bueno. I mean, ice cream didn't help, talking to my friends isn't helping, even reading or trying to sketch is just...too stressful. Because every time I pick up a book, I think "Wow - I'll never be able to make my book this good" and every time I try to draw what I imagine to be the setting, it looks like a kindergarden student attacked a piece of paper with a pen. It's so frustrating and I really just have no clue what I'm doing.
I wasn't kidding when I told my cousin I didn't know what to do with my days after I finished writing, but now it feels like such a daunting task, rewriting and editing that I just don't want to do it anymore. I really just don't know what happened, because just the other day I was so excited, so ready to work and now I just want to burn it and everything related to it. :/
I think I'm just going to go to bed and sleep this depressing mood off.
Until next time,
Ashley the...burned out.
The Woes of Technology
My ipod got seriously messed up and my computer stopped reading my music so I lost everything. EVERYTHING. All my music. I had over ten thousand songs. And a specific playlist for writing and also a soundtrack for my story. All inspiration is lost. People have told me things along the lines of "Just copy the files from your computer back on! Duh!" Well, it's not that simple. It's a new computer. My old Dell laptop had all my music on it but that got a virus on it and all my music files got corrupted. And my backups are missing. My musical inspiration...gone. Now I'm left with the books and movies. Yay? lol I'm done complaining now. My cousin is coming this week and his library is pretty legit so it should compensate for my lack of music.
Until next time,
Ashley the...fantastic. (Sarcastic)
Until next time,
Ashley the...fantastic. (Sarcastic)
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Constructive Criticism
It's a very good thing to get as a writer (and basically any other profession really). Right now, a very good friend of mine is sharing her thoughts and concerns about my story. It's so helpful to know what sucks and how to fix it because that's how you make it better. It was funny actually - she apologized beforehand for her bluntness because I told her to just go crazy in terms of what I needed to fix. Because I knew there was a lot that needed fixing. No lies. A LOT. And now I'm planning for the second draft and how to make that one better than the first. Because Ernest Hemmingway was correct. First drafts of anything are...well, crap.
I'm beginning to think that three months is a little too long to wait since I don't have that much time to kill. My parents are still a little less than pleased about my career choice and are subtly hinting at kicking me out. It's ah...an interesting home life. But I'm surviving. :) I'm also anxious to start rewriting since I have an idea of what to fix. For the first seven or so chapters, at least. But I'll hold out until the end of next week.
I think whoever said that writing the first draft of a book was hard is right. My thing was just getting the story out on paper (or the computer screen) - that's what kept me up at night, haunting me because I knew what I wanted to say, I just didn't want to write it out. Which is why quite a few chapters are so poorly written - I was just writing it to get it written. Kendall (my critiquing friend) was telling me that the dialogue for one scene was really awkward and was all "who says that?" and in my mind I was thinking "that was one of those scenes." It made me smile. But she was right. Again. :) I mean, after I had sent the manuscript out, I reread a few pages and that was one of them and I honestly cringed. I thought to myself, "I wrote that?" And not in a good way.
So. It may be hard to take criticism, but it's TOTALLY worth it. It makes you a better writer (or whatever) and knowing your weaknesses helps you to overcome them. Like, for example, I am not subtle. AT ALL. It was pointed out. In quite a few instances. And now I know what to do to fix that. Was it hard to hear? A little. But how else am I going to learn? :)
Until next time,
Ashley the neat-freak with a messy room
"This woman is about as subtle as a gun." ~ Andrew Paxton, The Proposal
I'm beginning to think that three months is a little too long to wait since I don't have that much time to kill. My parents are still a little less than pleased about my career choice and are subtly hinting at kicking me out. It's ah...an interesting home life. But I'm surviving. :) I'm also anxious to start rewriting since I have an idea of what to fix. For the first seven or so chapters, at least. But I'll hold out until the end of next week.
I think whoever said that writing the first draft of a book was hard is right. My thing was just getting the story out on paper (or the computer screen) - that's what kept me up at night, haunting me because I knew what I wanted to say, I just didn't want to write it out. Which is why quite a few chapters are so poorly written - I was just writing it to get it written. Kendall (my critiquing friend) was telling me that the dialogue for one scene was really awkward and was all "who says that?" and in my mind I was thinking "that was one of those scenes." It made me smile. But she was right. Again. :) I mean, after I had sent the manuscript out, I reread a few pages and that was one of them and I honestly cringed. I thought to myself, "I wrote that?" And not in a good way.
So. It may be hard to take criticism, but it's TOTALLY worth it. It makes you a better writer (or whatever) and knowing your weaknesses helps you to overcome them. Like, for example, I am not subtle. AT ALL. It was pointed out. In quite a few instances. And now I know what to do to fix that. Was it hard to hear? A little. But how else am I going to learn? :)
Until next time,
Ashley the neat-freak with a messy room
"This woman is about as subtle as a gun." ~ Andrew Paxton, The Proposal
Friday, August 6, 2010
New Ideas!
Picture this. It's a hot summer day, about 11:00 in the morning. The sun is shining down on your yard and you're not even halfway done mowing it but you know you have to finish or your parents will have a field day and possibly throw you out of the house. You take a swig of lukewarm water from a water bottle that sat in the fridge for almost an hour and grimace because it tastes like it went through a garbage disposal. You close your eyes as you sit in the lawn chair in the garage, basking in the shade, feeling a cool breeze blow through. You could almost fall asleep there if you really wanted to. In fact, you almost do. And then you have this monumental revelation about a scene that would totally work in your book and make things a little more interesting.
Well, that's exactly what happened to me. :D It was beautiful. But of course, if I ran inside to get my notebook, I'd never want to leave. So I keyed it into my phone. Because I'm just that awesome. Anyways. I finished the lawn and am back in the cool confines of my room. I just emailed the fourth copy of my manuscript to my friend for him to critique and I'm about to clean my room because it really needs it and I can't concentrate amongst all the clutter and...well...mess. My goal is to get a decent-sized pile of stuff to donate and then treat myself to more brainstorming for my new NaNoWriMo novel. November really needs to get here...
Until next time,
Ashley the Tired
"Life is cruel. Why should the afterlife be any different?" ~ Davey Jones, Pirates of the Caribbean
Current theme song for my story: Little Girl by Trading Yesterday
Well, that's exactly what happened to me. :D It was beautiful. But of course, if I ran inside to get my notebook, I'd never want to leave. So I keyed it into my phone. Because I'm just that awesome. Anyways. I finished the lawn and am back in the cool confines of my room. I just emailed the fourth copy of my manuscript to my friend for him to critique and I'm about to clean my room because it really needs it and I can't concentrate amongst all the clutter and...well...mess. My goal is to get a decent-sized pile of stuff to donate and then treat myself to more brainstorming for my new NaNoWriMo novel. November really needs to get here...
Until next time,
Ashley the Tired
"Life is cruel. Why should the afterlife be any different?" ~ Davey Jones, Pirates of the Caribbean
Current theme song for my story: Little Girl by Trading Yesterday
Thursday, August 5, 2010
Book Two?
So. I've been hit (slammed, more like) with ideas for another book - it's actually the prequel to the one I just finished. Apparently my characters won't leave me alone. Granted, I was toying with the idea of a sequel but that really didn't happen until the ending took a crazy twist. But a prequel...I wasn't expecting that. I do have material I can potentially use (I'd have to rewrite it all in a different POV) so it won't be like pantsing the novel during NaNoWriMo (like last year). Anyways...yeah. I dragged out a new notebook and started writing down my ideas and thoughts and I have to admit - I like what I'm seeing. It won't have the magic-based background like HTCF - it's more centered in reality this time - but I have been wanting to write something like that so it's all good. :)
Until next time,
Ashley the Bemused
"No course is lost if but one fool is left to fight" ~ Will Turner, Pirates of the Caribbean
Until next time,
Ashley the Bemused
"No course is lost if but one fool is left to fight" ~ Will Turner, Pirates of the Caribbean
Peer Support
You know, I took a rather nasty figurative beating last night in terms of my book. My parents are still unsupportive of my writing and it's not going to get any better probably. But my friend Tara Bennit helped me out later that night by saying that it doesn't much matter that they don't appreciate what I do - just about all my friends are dying to read even just the terrible first draft, which means a lot because it shows that they support me in the way I wish my parents would. And she was right in saying that I have enough peer support not to give up on this crazy dream of mine. She also told me that when I get published I have every right to say "I told you so." :)
So if anyone's reading this, just know that even if your parents don't approve of how you want to live your life, know that you aren't alone. It may be more difficult but it will all be worth it in the end. If I decided to give up every time my parents said I was wasting my time, I'd never have made it past the prologue. And here I am, a prologue, 19 chapters and an epilogue later with just enough drive to keep on pushing forward.
Until next time,
Ashley the Dreamer
"If I may lend a machete to your intellectual thicket." ~ Jack Sparrow, Pirates of the Caribbean
So if anyone's reading this, just know that even if your parents don't approve of how you want to live your life, know that you aren't alone. It may be more difficult but it will all be worth it in the end. If I decided to give up every time my parents said I was wasting my time, I'd never have made it past the prologue. And here I am, a prologue, 19 chapters and an epilogue later with just enough drive to keep on pushing forward.
Until next time,
Ashley the Dreamer
"If I may lend a machete to your intellectual thicket." ~ Jack Sparrow, Pirates of the Caribbean
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Just a Tip
So, when I'm writing, I always either get really really tired or really really hungry. So. To solve both of these at the same time, I made sure to always keep some form of junk food (cheez-its, reese's puffs etc.) on hand - it kept me somewhat busy so I could keep my eyes open and I wasn't quite as hungry anymore. That being said, make sure to take a break every now and then to stretch so you don't get too stiff or whatever.
The only reason I thought of mentioning this is because I just ran out of cheez-its. Not that I was writing or anything. No, I'm staying true to my resolution of not writing for the next three months - good for viewing the manuscript with fresh eyes, like I said earlier. It is true though - needing that break. For example, when I gave the prologue to my violin teacher, I didn't realize I hadn't fixed the locations in the book because I changed them a few weeks ago - I thought I did when I scanned through it, but I was so used to what it said and everything that I wasn't paying close enough attention. And believe me, I felt mighty embarrassed when she mentioned that the places I used were the places I grew up in. (I started off using my hometown and my current home as places of reference because they were what I knew best but changed it later on because it didn't work as well as I thought it would - if only I payed more attention...)
Anyways...yeah. I was just surfing the net and was hungry so I grabbed my handy box of cheez-its because it was the closest thing to me. Such inspiration.
I did end up making a list of all the movies and books I want to see/read for further inspiration - it's a pretty long list so I'll just mention a few at a time.
Movies:
The Proposal
Sherlock Holmes
Pride & Prejudice (Keira Knightley version)
Inkheart
The Corpse Bride
Books:
The Mortal Instruments series by Cassandra Clare
Gallagher Girls series by Ally Carter
The Pale Assassin by Patricia Elliott
The Luxe series by Anna Godberson
House of Night series (I focused on Tempted and Burned) by P.C. Cast and Kristin Cast
And more to come. :)
Until next time,
Ashley the Recuperating
The only reason I thought of mentioning this is because I just ran out of cheez-its. Not that I was writing or anything. No, I'm staying true to my resolution of not writing for the next three months - good for viewing the manuscript with fresh eyes, like I said earlier. It is true though - needing that break. For example, when I gave the prologue to my violin teacher, I didn't realize I hadn't fixed the locations in the book because I changed them a few weeks ago - I thought I did when I scanned through it, but I was so used to what it said and everything that I wasn't paying close enough attention. And believe me, I felt mighty embarrassed when she mentioned that the places I used were the places I grew up in. (I started off using my hometown and my current home as places of reference because they were what I knew best but changed it later on because it didn't work as well as I thought it would - if only I payed more attention...)
Anyways...yeah. I was just surfing the net and was hungry so I grabbed my handy box of cheez-its because it was the closest thing to me. Such inspiration.
I did end up making a list of all the movies and books I want to see/read for further inspiration - it's a pretty long list so I'll just mention a few at a time.
Movies:
The Proposal
Sherlock Holmes
Pride & Prejudice (Keira Knightley version)
Inkheart
The Corpse Bride
Books:
The Mortal Instruments series by Cassandra Clare
Gallagher Girls series by Ally Carter
The Pale Assassin by Patricia Elliott
The Luxe series by Anna Godberson
House of Night series (I focused on Tempted and Burned) by P.C. Cast and Kristin Cast
And more to come. :)
Until next time,
Ashley the Recuperating
After the Finish
So it's recommended that after finishing a draft, an author puts it away for about three months and then looks at it with fresh eyes. Well, guess what? THAT'S GOING TO DRIVE ME CRAZY!
Lucky for me, I have other non-writing things I can do for my book. Like finish making the ultimate playlist for writing said book so that when I DO get around to editing it, I'll have background music to write to. Or I can remake the collage of inspiration. Or read all my favorite books again and highlight the parts that I REALLY liked and determine why I like them and see how I can emulate that channel of inspiration into my own work.
And then there's all the other things like cross-stitching, drawing, practicing my violin and chores that I have basically been neglecting since last November (hehe nanowrimo month, go figure).
OH! I'm also (once it gets printed out) going to give a copy to my 12th grade english teacher for her to edit and help me revise, as well as one to my private violin teacher because she's going to try and find music to fit different parts of the story. How cool is that!? Now if only my family could be this supportive lol. :D
Current theme song for my book: Hero by Skillet
Current favorite quote from story: "I can hear the lie in your voice" ~ Paul (How the Cards Fell: Chapter 4)
Until next time,
Ashley the Overworked
Lucky for me, I have other non-writing things I can do for my book. Like finish making the ultimate playlist for writing said book so that when I DO get around to editing it, I'll have background music to write to. Or I can remake the collage of inspiration. Or read all my favorite books again and highlight the parts that I REALLY liked and determine why I like them and see how I can emulate that channel of inspiration into my own work.
And then there's all the other things like cross-stitching, drawing, practicing my violin and chores that I have basically been neglecting since last November (hehe nanowrimo month, go figure).
OH! I'm also (once it gets printed out) going to give a copy to my 12th grade english teacher for her to edit and help me revise, as well as one to my private violin teacher because she's going to try and find music to fit different parts of the story. How cool is that!? Now if only my family could be this supportive lol. :D
Current theme song for my book: Hero by Skillet
Current favorite quote from story: "I can hear the lie in your voice" ~ Paul (How the Cards Fell: Chapter 4)
Until next time,
Ashley the Overworked
Monday, August 2, 2010
I'M DONE!
THE BOOK IS DONE! TWO WEEKS BEFORE SCHEDULE! I'M SO EXCITED! Hence the caps. lol I think this occasion calls for caps. And ice cream. Which I am about to go retrieve from the depths of my freezer. Oh my gosh I can't believe I did it!
Until next time,
Ashley the Tired but EXCITED!
Until next time,
Ashley the Tired but EXCITED!
ONE MORE TO GO!
Oh my goodness today has been eventful! I went to my friend's surprise party and played some pretty epic frisbee and ninja games - no lies, two people battled it out in the bushes and my friend Sam jumped out at me, and another friend of mine, Josh, climbed a tree to avoid getting out. The most hilarious thing to watch was him falling out of it. But then it became between the two of us and it was very tiring - like intense dancing. Wicked awesome though.
And then I came home and cranked out chapter 17 so now all I have to do is finish chapter 10! OH MY GOSH! It's almost over! And then rewrites begin. But I won't think about that just yet - my new main stresser is where I'm going to print the manuscript...it's currently at 117 pages (probably going to end up being around 120-123 pages long) so that's going to be a bit pricey at staples or kinkos...yay. Haha - some people said writing the novel was the hardest part - I beg to differ. Editing it and rewriting it seems to be the biggest complication right now. lol I'm just going to finish writing chapter 10 before I continue on this rant. I'M SO EXCITED!
Until next time,
Ashley the Overly Excited
And then I came home and cranked out chapter 17 so now all I have to do is finish chapter 10! OH MY GOSH! It's almost over! And then rewrites begin. But I won't think about that just yet - my new main stresser is where I'm going to print the manuscript...it's currently at 117 pages (probably going to end up being around 120-123 pages long) so that's going to be a bit pricey at staples or kinkos...yay. Haha - some people said writing the novel was the hardest part - I beg to differ. Editing it and rewriting it seems to be the biggest complication right now. lol I'm just going to finish writing chapter 10 before I continue on this rant. I'M SO EXCITED!
Until next time,
Ashley the Overly Excited
Oh my goodness!
TWO CHAPTERS LEFT! Chapters 10 and 17 remain :D Oh my gosh it's almost done!
*ahem* Just thought I'd get that out of my system...
Until next time,
Ashley the Certifiably Crazy
*ahem* Just thought I'd get that out of my system...
Until next time,
Ashley the Certifiably Crazy
The End of the Book is Nigh
With only four chapters remaining (actually a little less since I have partials of 10 and 15), I am getting more excited about this. It's a little overwhelming, knowing that I've been working on this book for almost a year now and it's finally almost finished! I have over 25,000 words and over 100 pages, which is totally amazing because there were so many times where I thought it would never get done - that it wasn't worth it or I lacked the skills and abilities to actually pull something like this off. It's definitely going to get better from here, knowing the end is just around the corner. :)
The muse is back and ready to get to work again so I better go.
Until next time,
Ashley the Ecstatic
The muse is back and ready to get to work again so I better go.
Until next time,
Ashley the Ecstatic
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